We have already said that cancer does not discriminate. It can choose anybody of any age. I had an overwhelming moment prior to the second chemo session. I shared how I felt with my family. I described my emotions like a painting of dots. I felt like the small black dot and everybody else around me represented the colourful dots. Everybody told me that the latter is a unique way to describe these emotions. My family understood why I felt like the black dot. I had been given the shock of my life. Later on, I said to my sisters that I want to be a gold dot on the painting and we decided that this is what I have to push myself to continuously feel because some of this battle is about my strong and positive mindset. However, it is normal to have moments where you feel like the black dot.
The analogy of the painting can be extended to what has been spoken about in previous blogs. That is to say, the need for women (young women included) to be more aware about ovarian cancer. If you feel you have any of the symptoms then you must keep going to get checked. Don’t allow the symptoms to be confused for IBS. Don’t take the risk. This is because we must be vigilant in terms of looking out for signs and symptoms of ovarian cancer, and checking things that worry us or we are not sure about. Being extra cautious keeps the chances of ever feeling like the black dot as low as possible. All women must remain colourful dots (you can choose your colour!) however difficult it may be.
Another analogy I heard came from my boyfriend, Jonny. He said, ‘Imagine you are in a car, driving to a destination. As you are driving, there is an accident ahead and you end up stuck in traffic. The whole time you are stuck in traffic you are thinking about what you could be doing at the destination (who I’d see, who I could be talking to, etc). ‘He continued by saying, ‘The waiting in traffic, knowing that you may be missing things, is frustrating but ultimately, the traffic eases and you reach the destination a little delayed.’ This analogy made me feel better because even though ‘Cyril’ has delayed aspects of my life, ultimately I will still accomplish them albeit a few months later than I wanted.